I fought the law and the law won

Last I checked, amnesia did not cause heart conditions

• Jade: guess what part im at
• Sarah: the same cunting part?
• Jade: the same cunting part
• Sarah: good luck
• Jade: thank you
• Jade: i will need it
• Jade: fldsjfa;l
• Jade: i need to chill out
• Jade: im all jittery
• Sarah: think about the noodles thing
• Jade: I WANNA SCREAM
• Jade: IT WAS TIRIGHT THERE
• Jade: RIGHT
• Jade: THEIRHKJDSKDHSKLJDHSLKJHDSKJ
• Jade: im so fucking tempted
• Jade: to just
• Jade: fucking
• Jade: go into the game files
• Jade: and get rid of the monsters
• Jade: dude im all jittery on the inside
• Jade: this stupid fucking game probably gave me a heart condiiton

• Jade: what
• Jade: the fuck is going on
• Jade: o m g
• Jade: what the hel
• Jade: l
• Jade: well
• Jade: fuck

• Jade: uh
• Jade: okay
• Jade: im in a cell
• Jade: do you remember a cell
• Jade: how the fuck do i get out
• Jade: op
• Jade: wait
• Jade: we got some lose bricks on our hand
• Jade: maybe my nifty hammer and chipper will save the day
• Jade: HOLY SHIT THAT WORKED
• Jade: okay now there is a fucking 2x4 blocking my eay
• Jade: okay i pulled on the 2x4 and pissed the game up because some more spider web jizz just covered the cell door
• Jade: WHOA
• Jade: I JUST BROKE THE FUCKING WALL DOWN
• Jade: WHAT DID I EVEN DO
• Jade: IT JUST FUCKING EXPLODED
• Jade: WHAT THE CHRIST JUST HAPPENED
• Jade: the screen goes white, my computer makes a KNNNCHSH noise, and then a body just kind of happens
• Jade: what the hell man
• Jade: ahah he's nekkid
• Jade: i can see his willy
• Jade: i can move around his arms and legs but i cant move around his willy
• Jade: dammit

• Jade: OMG
• Jade: IM SORRY GAME
• Jade: JFKFJHJSKLHESJKE
• Sarah: huh
• Jade: I DID SOMETHIGN WITH THE MEAT AND THE WELL AND SUDDENLY MY SANITY IS DOT DOT DOT AND I CAN HEAR SOME FUCKING FREAKY MUSIC THAT KIND OF SOUNDS LIKE HTE LEADUP TO THE CHORUS IN AEROSMITH'S "DREAM ON"

• Jade: MY EYES JSUT LIKE FELL OUT
• Jade: cause i heard a monster
• Jade: fuck this noise
• Jade: my cracka ass cant jump up on this thigner
• Sarah: > die
• > reincarnate as a good jumper
• > problem solved
• Jade: AYSAUISOAYWAUIAHAIVYUGFIHJKAAS
• Jade: AUHS
• Jade: I HERARDFD
• Jade: THE
• Jade: EYYYYEYEYEYYYYYYEYEY MUSIC
• Jade: KFHSKHFS
• Jade: HELP
• Jade: HOLE M
• Jade: MY BODY
• Jade: NOT READY
• Sarah: okay I moved but I'm back now
• Sarah: and no save yo own cracka ass
• Jade: KHJFLDSLLHKFJDS
• Jade: YOU RE N HELP
• Jade: dis mufucka is gonna punch me to pluto and yoreu like LOL GOTTA WARM ME BOTTOM ON THE BATHROM FLOAR
• Sarah: it took you 7 years to figure that out
• Sarah: and yup
• Jade: I SAW HIM
• Jade: IASN:ADHAJKDKLAJSKLAJDAKL:DJAKL:DJAKL:DJAKLDBAJKEBAUHEILK:HENBHIEUIJKA

• Jade: why does this game think its funny to just have random earthquakes
• Jade: dat shit aint cool brah
• Sarah: because of people like you
• Jade: the fuck is that supposed to mean
• Sarah: you freak out at the game really easily
• Sarah: so
• Jade: HEARD A MONSTER
• Jade: CHOKED ON MY SANDWHICH
• Jade: NEARLY DIED
• Sarah: that's what I'm talking about
• Sarah: right there
• Sarah: that
• Sarah: that's it
• Sarah: that is why the game likes to throw in shit like earthquakes

• Jade: okay i was dicking around in my inventory and i dragged the glass jar that held the acid onto the string AND IT MADE A LEGITIMATE ITEM
• Jade: now what the fuck do i do with it
• Jade: can i put ht emeat in ti
• Sarah: try
• Jade: . . .
• Jade: no
• Jade: didnt work
• Jade: ew i can hear a water monster in the well
• Jade: i kinda want to jump in it but im scared
• Jade: fuck
• Jade: like, i know that im gonna fall and something is gonna kill me
• Jade: but that doesnt stop me from screaming and shiting my pants
• Jade: and dad is home
• Jade: hes gon be like bitch what you doin
• Sarah: explain to him that MONSTERS
• Jade: IM GOIN FOR THE WELL
• Sarah: GO FOR IT BBY
• Jade: aww daniel made a whimpery noise and i squeaked
• Jade: hw should be a team
• Jade: of pussies
• Sarah: wot
• Jade: whoa it spawned me in the most random place
• Jade: o wait
• Jade: im in the trancept
• Jade: i got bitchslapped here once